January 18, 2026
High levels of clitoral pain throughout the night; it feels as though someone is pinching really hard between their thumb and forefinger; there was also a lot of pelvic pain; my period started without warning; I complained to the person applying the pain that it was too much and that my period had started, but this made no difference; pain tends to be much higher at night making it difficult to sleep.
There have been high levels of clitoral pain throughout the day.
I am continuing to get rid of my things and clean the apartment; the people doing this have said it would be better if I left at some point.
I still wonder if my mother is really dead; given the police watching me are prone to lying, manipulation, and abuse, I don’t take anything they say at face value
The police turned up the heat a few days ago and like always, I now feel very angry; I have been turning off the network, my laptop, etc. to shut them out in part so I don’t just go on at them about being garbage, etc.; to be honest, I am doing it more for my own sanity than theirs; they claim the heat is being applied so that I will be prepared should something happen or I need to leave; once again, I think more harm is being done than good; feelings of hatred have returned and I simply want to leave which is pretty much what I have been working on all day; I explained to the police that they were doing more hard than good, but the police disagreed; this is interesting to me because they previously agreed that they had generally been doing more harm than good particularly in North Hollywood; they also agreed that I did a much better job of taking care of myself than they were able to do; they also said they probably put me at greater risk by removing me from my home than by allowing me to stay; as I typed this last statement, pain in my clitoris and head was increased; I made it clear that what I was saying was true and that someone had agreed to to this, that the person needs to go back and talk to their team; pain in the clitoris and head was increased again anyway.
I asked whether the heat had increased for any particular reason and the response was yes that it was being done because I had been difficult; I said that this was a very predictable response to heat exposure and that the only reason to do it was to cause problems and drama; the reply was yes.
9:09pm - much more pain and burning than usual applied to vaginal area; pain in the genital area has been consistent since this afternoon despite asking them to stop; I made it clear that I had disonnected tech to avoid having problems due to anger caused by overheating with microwave; there seemed to be agreement with this, but the use of pain has continued since last night; I am unsure why the change occurred; there was some difficulty last night with one of the police, but otherwise things have been mostly civil; I have been clear that I will keep the tech and microphones turned off to avoid problems with the police working tonight.
Pain and burning is much higher than usual; I am unclear what caused this; I have done nothing to deserve this; I do not think it can be punishment; I have been given no explanation for why it is occurring; when I ask for it to stop it continues or increases; I have explained I am having my period and I am experiencing cramping already but this has made no difference; I have explained I am not in a position to leave the area; I spent the day cleaning my apartment; I want to be extremely clear that I do not like what is being done to me and I do not consent.
This is the statment that ChatGPT worked with me to create: “Your actions are inappropriate. I do not consent to this interaction. I am choosing to remain silent.”
If the behavior continues:
“I have asked you to stop. I am documenting this interaction.”
It turned out that the police wanted me to come home at 9pm and rather than communicate this, they turned to genital and head pain (they had me visiting a bar where I was ordering Shirley Temples until 11pm, but 9pm at a cafe is out of the question…)
Since returning home, they are applying an unusual amount of head pain; I have been given no reason for why they have decided to use pain despite asking; the death grip on my clitoris has been removed and replaced by mild to moderate pelvic pain before starting up again along with vaginal pain and burning.
They are adamant they want the microphones on all the tech up and running, but they are also being punitive and I am not comfortable having the tech on all night if this is the case. (I wake up a bit disoriented and am more vulnerable to being hassled and getting angry.)